all this "numbness" you talk about.. i just wish i could have it for a minute.
sixty seconds of nothing. i would appreciate it. no heaven, no hell, just a blank.
it scares me knowing i could actually force myself into this.
but i know i won't. i can't. that's not me.
now what really scares me..
you've done that to yourself so many times.. i wonder if there is a way back.
well.. i believe there is. otherwise i wouldn't be sitting and waiting for you to find it.
but i have to say this...
you're missing so much locked up in there! it's like your favorite song is playing and you're refusing to dance to it.. it's a new season out here. it's getting warmer and people are much happier than they were before. i'm happier too. more confident you'll join me soon. i hope so.. i'm a fucking pile of hopes. please come.
